How to Fight Back When Things Feel Totally Out of Control

Throughout the course of a day, you must make multiple decisions. Whether it is picking what to wear, what activities to do, or who to visit, life consists of constant decision-making at almost every minute.

Everyone can make decisions and plans for their lives, but nobody will ever be ready for the unexpected. When these unexpected events pile up, it is easy to get overly anxious and feel like your life is spiraling out of control. This is why we desire control whenever possible.

Take this as an example, when someone is a careful driver and always pays attention to their surroundings while driving, but one day, they get into an accident and it results in a disability. Even though they have been trying to control things they could, they couldn’t escape this bad luck. This thing happens because no matter how hard we try to control our lives and make sure everything will not go south, there will always be a possibility for things to go wrong because we only control ours and we can not control others. 

How could this happen? Why do we feel like everything in our lives running without our cues?

This phenomenon can easily happen when you are cramped with these things:


The constant bombardment of stress typically results in the rise of anxiety and negative emotions. You may feel overburdened by the pressure of trying to manage your family, career, and money at the same time. It is crucial to try and manage stress since it can be really harmful and make life feel completely out of control.


There are times when your job takes all of your time and appears to take over your entire existence. You might get overwhelmed by the amount of work you have to complete both within and outside of the job. It is easy to get caught up in the urge to stay busy and productive all the time, but maintaining a healthy balance is vital.


Many health problems are just beyond your control since they can be caused by genetics, environmental conditions, or simply by coincidence. It might be hard to put health concerns aside and live in the moment, but it is important that you do not stress excessively. You can only truly focus on things you can control, which are taking the proper precautions, practicing wellness, and trying to be optimistic. 


We have been living through a pandemic for more than 2 years while also experiencing natural catastrophes and societal injustices that happened before our eyes. It is essential to find ways to process these things since they can lead to anxiety and fear.


You can be feeling completely overwhelmed if you’ve recently gone through a tragic life event. Tragedies frequently strike suddenly and harshly, causing many intense and overpowering emotions. Because these events are beyond your control, you may feel powerless and lost. Tragic events frequently result in unpleasant feelings that might linger in you long after the event has passed. A tragedy may feel like an unexpected or unpreventable attack. When confronted with such unpredictable circumstances, you may feel as though you have no control over your own emotions or your reaction to the tragedy.

So, all the things that hit us badly, really badly. How do we get out of it?

When you feel out of control, your mind will often go wild, conjuring up the worst-case scenario and all the things you can’t control. You can practice these things to make sure you know what to do when you feel things are getting out of control.


Accept the things you can not change. Your persistent urge to manage situations that are beyond your control is often what makes you feel out of control. The battle is tiring and unpleasant. Acceptance trains your brain to return to and focus on the “now and now.” Make plans for the things you can control and do not waste energy attempting to change those over which you have no control. Accepting that you can not control everything is an essential component of coping with problems. By doing so, you will be able to move on and make decisions that will improve your life.

Take it as a wake-up call

Sometimes, it is too easy to take your life and those you care about for granted. When something unexpected happens in your life, it may just be the wake-up call you need to appreciate everyone, including yourself. A reminder that you need to pay attention more to your surroundings and appreciate every good thing that has happened in your life.

It helps you grow

As the saying says, there is a blessing in disguise, this can also apply to every unexpected thing that takes a turn in your life that somehow may teach you something about life. This allows you to be wiser and stronger.

Be proud of yourself

Give yourself credit for each step forward as you move through a life-changing experience. Acknowledging your accomplishments, no matter how small it is. You will likely experience a feeling of accomplishment after identifying what you can and can not control and beginning to modify the things you can. If, on the other hand, you try to control things beyond your control, you are setting yourself up for failure, which will only make you feel even more out of control.

Talk to someone

It is helpful to talk about what could be stressing and overwhelming you to someone with whom you can express your problems and anxieties. They can be your loved one or professional advice from a therapist. They can help you in examining these emotions and sort them out wisely.

Give yourself some space

Taking a step back from overwhelming emotions will help you ensure you are behaving appropriately. One of the ways is to leave a stressful situation. However, you may build mental distance by distracting yourself. While you do not want to completely ignore or avoid feelings, it is not a bad idea to divert yourself until you are in a better position to deal with them. Healthy diversion is just temporary, you have to back to reality at some point.

Try meditation

Meditation can help you become more aware of all of your feelings and emotions. By meditating, you are training yourself to sit with those emotions and recognize them without criticizing or trying to change or avoid them. Accepting all of your feelings might help you manage your emotions. It can also make you relax and sleep better.


Life is full of surprises and unexpected things, and we can not escape every single one of them. However, by trying all the stated tips above, you can be stronger and wiser, and perhaps all the difficult things–that used to make you think that your life is spinning out of control–will not give you that feeling again. We will never know until we try, so let’s just try it!